my good friend
is homeless…and that feeling when its late at night and I have to drive him to his “place” is a terrible feeling…and then I get to drive back, enter my gated community, lock my apartment door, fall into bed and sleep…believing and feeling confident that I am safe and warm for the night…..
And I hate that he’s the only homeless person that I care about…and I can’t do crap
I’m not sure if I posted about this earlier. I go to a private Christian school and things have been very tough for me these past couple of years. I’ve gone into my 5th year so most of my close friends graduated last year and I really haven’t had many people to talk to. I decided at the beginning of the semester that I shouldn’t come out to anyone else at school, just for my own safety to make sure that the school doesn’t do anything terrible like kick me out. While this was for safety, its been killing me emotionally for the past 5 months. I’ve had no one to talk to and I’ve had to lie by omission every time someone has asked me “how are you?” or “whats going on in your life?” Yeah, its been killing me. I have this one friend who poured her heart out to me one night, and then she asked what was goin on in my life and I told her that I couldn’t tell her because I decided that I shouldn’t talk to more people.
I told her tonight. While she doesn’t necessary believe that its okay, she still wants to be my friend…while its not amazing, it still felt good to finally take down one of the many bricks that has been “guarding” my heart these past 5 months…Lets see, which one next?