Odd…

I could re reading into things…

But I think my roommate isn’t talking to me

And I thought we were on good terms…

whatever

I’m kinda okay with it

Older guy messaged me back

……..

Great…now I’m talking to a 45 year old

……………what am I doing……….

Long Talk with roommate

I think its better.

Hopefully it lasts.

I love how whenever I like someone

It blows up in my face….

I’m sorry I think you’re awesome

Decided…I do want distance

It may sound stupid…even selfish…

But I don’t want the kind of best friend that he wants to offer

All he does is complicate my life and my emotions

I want someone to do that if they are my boyfriend. And, no, I do not mean that I want my boyfriend to complicate my life and emotions in a bad way…I mean in a good way.

I’m not so sure if this life can be fixed

…Maybe it would be best to just start over somewhere new

I’ve been sending subtle hints to my roommate/crush that I want more distance between us…I don’t want to be the one making food with him. I don’t want to make him lunch/dinner 5 times a week. I don’t want to watch movies with him 4 times a week. I don’t want to do his laundry. I don’t want to be the one he relies on all of the time…..In short, I don’t want things to look like we are in a relationship if we are not. 

Is that a bad thing?

Its also kind of sad that I know that in 2 days everything will be back to normal

Oh the awkward-ness

Other roommates are gone…its just us…

I wish I would realize that its not us…its him, and me.

San Diego is online…

I miss talking to him…but he’s not messaging me

Looking at old pictures

Found some of the San Diego crush…I miss talking to him